Are you committed or stuck?

By: Kristin Martineau | March 20, 2019

I have to clean the house.

I have to make sure everyone gets where they need to go.

I have to make dinner.

I have to teach a lesson at church.

I have to work to support my family.

I have to take care of my kids.

Do any of these thoughts sound familiar?

I’ve got good news for you.

You don’t have to do any of it.

Really, you don’t.

You could let someone else raise your kids. People do it all the time.

You don’t have to clean.

You don’t have to work.

Stop telling yourself you have to.

It’s disempowering.  It makes you feel stuck.

The truth is that you choose to do all of these things.

I used to tell myself that I had to finish cleaning the kitchen after the kids were in bed.  I’d get mad if my husband didn’t want to help me.

Of course he didn’t want to clean the kitchen.  Neither did I.  But I had to.

Eventually, I realized that I could just decide I was ok with not cleaning. Surprise! Nothing bad happens. Sometimes I decide that I’d rather practice playing guitar and the kitchen can stay the way it is.

Sometimes I decide that I want a clean kitchen more than I want to do other things.

It’s a choice I’m making because I want a clean kitchen for me. Not because I have to do it.

You get to decide.

You can do the dishes feeling angry and resentful that you have to do them.  Or you can do the dishes knowing that you choose it because you like a clean kitchen.

It’s the same action.  You can decide how to feel about it.

Why do you do what you do?

Because you want to.

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