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To someone that doesn’t have ADHD, the symptoms can be bewildering and frustrating. Chances are though that once upon a time, those very same symptoms had something to do with why you fell in love in the first place.
The truth is: Your ADHD partner hasn’t changed. What’s changed is what you are making their behavior mean. If they are no longer so focused on you, you might make it mean that they don’t love you anymore. If they blow the budget, you might make it mean that they don’t care about your future together. If they leave messes all over the house, you might make it mean that they don’t respect you and your shared space.
Trust me when I say that your spouse most likely doesn’t mean any of these things, you’ll save yourself a lot of resentment if you just ask yourself (or them! nicely of course) why they do what they do. I bet you they aren’t going to say, “I left all this paint out because I don’t respect your space.”
You are allowed to make requests of your spouse. You can still work together to find solutions in your marriage, but get clear on the real reason they do what they do.
If you relate to our story or think our expertise would benefit you or a loved one, schedule your first appointment today.